Tuesday, August 1, 2006


by Hillzie and Kat

Conner, the Lady Hooligans’ tennis coach, has allowed us to discuss and define some of his on-court expressions, which we lovingly call “Connerisms”. Conner punctuates our weekly one-hour class on Court 8 with one, two and three-word phrases to help guide us in our tennis journey. They often prove useful off-court as well. And, yes, Conner is a Pretty; did you even have to ask?

Accelerate = Finish the stroke by accelerating through the end of the swing. Legend has it this will help prevent “homeruns” and run-ins with the dreaded tape.

Finish Your Swing = If this requires explanation you may not be ready for the wisdom of Conner.

Get Low or Git Low = Bend those knees and get down for that shot. This has something to do with physics.

Get Up, Git Up, Get There or Git There = Move your ass and sprint to the ball!

Good = A nice, decent shot. Variation: Nice.

Mercy = Noun: an extra chance to take your shot, after blowing the first and second feed. Verb: when you beg for one more feed.

No = Just playin’. As in, “Nadal is coming by later to hit with you. No.”

Pimp Snap or Pimp Snizzap = A certain je ne sais quois needed for a tasty serve or over-head shot. A phat snap of the wrist.

Pink or Pinkie = An actual pink tennis ball thrown into the mix to keep us on our toes. Kind of like getting the Whammy on Press Your Luck. No wait, Conner’s dog ball was more like a Whammy. Thud! Thank goodness someone stole that.

Regroup = The mother of all Connerisms. After losing your focus, your balance or your racquet you must regroup and get back in the game. It’s a life lesson, really.

Show Me Again, Again or Uno Mas = Despite your turn technically being over, Conner will make you see the error of your ways and give you a chance or chances to finish on a Good one.

Soft Hands = Noun: when you possess a delicate drop shot-making ability, especially up at the net. Verb: when you need to figure out how to get this delicate drop shot-making ability.

Sugar = A sweet, universal replacement for foul language. As in, “Sugar!”

That’s Dirty = A sly shot that wins the point. Not necessarily fair or sportsmanlike, but a winner. Is “Dirty” bad or good? You be the judge. Variation: Dirty-Dirty. Unsportsmanlike.

That’s Tough = A hard ball to get to. Completely fair and all, but you got beat.

Too Good = What we strive for! A shot that is beautiful and unbeatable. A fair and untouchable winner.

Twisty or Twisty McGee = Not holding your proper stance and twisting your mid-section too early during your stroke. Variation: Hold Your Position. The more direct approach.

Win by Two = When a competition is close there must be a definitive winner. Tying is for sailors. Players win by two.

Connerisms © CK